Monday, July 27, 2009

A Birthday Letter...A Little Late

Dear Matthew,

My one year old wonder. How did you get to be one already? Weren't you just a tiny little guy who needed mommy to tend to your every want and need? Wasn't it you just the other night I cradled in my arms and snuggled with at 2 in the morning watching The Nanny on tv? Didn't we just cheer the victories of learning how to roll over? How did this year go by so fast?

You are a complete joy to me. Every day is a new adventure. You are exceling at a rapid rate. Learning and growing and reaching forward into the world of being a toddler. I love how now you can show your excitement by clapping for something. It fills my heart when I sing and you clap for me when I'm done. How did I get so lucky as to be your mommy? God knew you were just who we needed on earth. When I'm sad and aching with pain and missing all the people in my life who have gone on you smile at me and I realize why I'm still here. I take very seriously the job of guiding you through the days and making sure you are nourished in every possible way. From veggies and fruit and milk to hugs when you fall down.

I hold close to my heart all the days of your first year. And I welcome the excitement that comes with your second year. Your first 365 days were filled with all kinds of first. The first time we took you to the beach when you were a wee little guy. Your first halloween and that beautiful caterpillar costume that mommy just knew you had to wear. Your first Christmas and how you were so excited although you didn't quite understand what was going on. Your first superbowl, which was also the night your first tooth broke through. So many many good memories that your daddy and I will have to tell you about. This next year has a lot of firsts too. And as you'll experience all the holidays and vacation again it will be a whole new experience. You'll be more invested in what's going on and I can't wait to watch you see the world a little more clearer than you did last year.

You are just the love of my life, the reason I breathe and every moment of the day with you is just pure love. You just fill my world with healing and joy and total happiness. I can't even put into words how much I love being your mommy. You, my son, are the most amazing creature. I don't know how I ever lived without you in my life. And I'm willing to bet I'm not the only one that feels that way.

Love forever and always,


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